literature

A Perfect Storm

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CephiraForest's avatar
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Literature Text

Gods Canvas,
A perfect storm...
Leaving me torn and helpless,
Leaving me with the norm.
I can't take this...

You came to me,
You breathed life in me,
You showed me the way life can be.

A life uncertain...
How can I decide to be
More than I can see?
I do not claim to be a poetess, but every once in a while I feel a little poetic (and emotional) and attempt to write one. Let me know what you think? Constructive criticism is always good, if you have any.
Thank you :)
© 2012 - 2024 CephiraForest
Comments4
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ChristyReserva's avatar
Just a TINY bit of constructive criticism to say the least here: a missing apostrophe in "Gods canvas". ^^; Other than that, I like the simplicity of this composition and the imagery it creates. As well as the emotion behind it right after "a perfect storm"... it's a neat paradox, much like "bittersweet" yet to the extreme although subtle. lol

On the other hand, I feel like there's a missing line after the last "More than I can see". :shrug: